'Everyone that owns a caravan is some form of sexual deviant' (Iain)
'I sometimes miss ASDA when I'm in Korea' (Korean Billy)
'Hey is that Gaztec Camera?' (Iain)
'Your voice sounded deep there, like your balls had dropped' (Paul)
'I've had enough of being the only decent radio show on British radio' (Iain)
'Let me leave you on this note...' (Bernie Clifton)
'Do you really wanna tell this story?' (Iain)
'Fool me once, more fool you. Fool me twice, I'm going to get angry. Fool me three times, you're an idiot' (Iain)
'You're the Nice to be Nice guy!' (Brian Wilson)
'He said "You nearly died twice" I said "I've died more times than that on stage" ' (Eddie Large)
'Crunch, crunch, crunch' (Biggin)
'I absorb the information like a sponge' (Caddick)
'I've been invited to Spike Milligan's house, I'm going to take the day off if I have to' (Louis Barfe)
'I always thought of her (Mama Cass) as a contemporary Sophie Tucker, she had a wicked sense of humour' (Dave Mason)
'An Alien done it with a monkey' (Prof Joe Laevens)
'Wagwan sexy' (Bill)
'I thought, well, if I put music to this it'll be a musical gang and it'll work, and it kind of did.' (Chris Difford)
'There's a lot of information out there which is suggesting that probably about 66% of the mass shootings, even the ISIS ones, are done under the influence of psychiatric drugs' (Paul)
'I was stood there waiting to be assigned to a job and suddenly Bobby came in...and he was the first person to speak to me out of 500 guys on the shop floor' (Tommy Cannon)
'We're gonna pull up in a van and you're gonna honeytrap him' (Iain)
'I think the artist is Baker Street' Ary
'Hands up who feels really uncomfortable right now?' (Iain)
'Who would want to turn down the chance to sing Sunshine Of Your Love with Jack Bruce?' (Ian Anderson)
'It sounds like a trick question' (Chris)
'If you cut the cheese I'm out of here' (Kath)
'She's quite an attractive woman once you see her close up' (Mark Vernon)
'Do you meet the criteria?' (Iain)
'It was a collaboration of symphony players, big band, swing musicians...and the hooligans, as we were called' ( Dougie Wright)
'If you call in, you'd better have a BLOODY good reason!' (Iain)
'We're more likely to believe something's the truth than to detect a lie, so they had human nature on their side' (Jeanie Finlay)
'If you want, Hemmo, I can touch myself while I'm talking to you' (Iain)
'This yoghurt story ain't gonna save the show or nothing' (Bill)
'I'm preparing the earth for when I have children' (Martin)
'He can hit me up on Grindr' (Herb Schatz)
'Oi!' (Chris)
'You are a nasty, nasty woman' (Iain)
'I've had enough of these people saying they can't sleep and then they get up.' (Arthur)
"I thought, sod it, I'm going to drink wine and eat chocolate instead' (Gail Emms)
'I would say to Theresa May "Make sure you get the best deal for Britain" ' (some kind of genius)
'I was appalled one day, I was watching television and I heard Gene Simmons say "Here's a song I wrote" and he sang God Gave Rock 'N Roll to you' (Rod Argent)
'Katie speaking, how may I help' ( a complete dodgepot)
'I've never understood the attraction of a penis' (Iain)
'Don't forget to boogie' (Joe)
'I created my own game of Risk, which was called...Chance.' (Simon Prime, Countyologist)
'Suddenly being mean is a sign of strength' Rex Hupkke
'I says to the wife "We're now building a proton pack" she says "Please don't" '(Paul)
'I'm struggling at the moment' (David)
'We're not in it for money, we're not in it for taking advantage, we're just in it for making their life complete' (Kev)
'Someone in this building thought it was funny to lock me in the talkRADIO toilet' (Iain)
' I'll tell you what, he's still at Never Neverland' (Steven)
'He kept that umbrella for 14 years longer than I've ever had an umbrella' (Martin Fitzgerald)
' "Mein Kampf for Kids" was a tricky one. (Scott Rogowsky)
'Come on Rosco' (bloke with somebody else's dog)
'JP can't handle his poppers' (Iain)
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